I will be giving a talk to parents in November and the topic will be on learning the temperament styles of children.
We all come with our own little packages of personality, likes, and styles. If parents understand their own temperament and seek to understand each child and how he or she is different or the same, we might avoid forcing children to be like US.
Have you ever had a child who reacts quite differently than you which becomes a source of frustration? Why don’t they like to go to the zoo? Don’t all kids love the zoo? Why is my child so shy? I’m always embarrassed of her in public. I’m not that way. Where did she get that? Poor genes from her dad’s side, I’m guessing!
Like the chameleon in this video, the job of a parent is really, really hard because it requires that we become a chameleon. Rather than forcing the child to be like US, we need to feel out the child, what color he is, and change ourselves accordingly. As the experts in this field call it, we are making a “goodness of fit.”